I was already in the midst of doing a series on laughter when I heard of Robin William’s death. There was no reason to change course.
The Balance
As with many around the planet, I am not just surprised by the news of Robin William’s passing but am surprised by how emotional his death is for me. I see again and again over the past 24 hours people talking and posting and responding to the event by stating flatly their shock, then their sadness, then their remembrance of how he moved them in his various character portrayals.
As I was watching one of the morning programs giving their headlines over to his death in a way not usually reserved for celebrities I was almost brought to tears. But then there was a huge shock. The next story? About the emergency food and water drop in Iraq and the brutal, cruel, barbaric killing going on there. The one after that? The continuing rise in deaths from Ebola. After that? The riot and aftermath in Ferguson, Missouri over the death of an unarmed teen at the hands of a police officer.
Report after report of the most brutal events came, one after another. And then it hit me. There is such a frail balance between joy and sorrow in the world. When you hear and see about such terrible atrocities around the globe, you really rely on those people and events that give you joy to balance it out. Having Robin Williams depart is a big blow to that balance for me. The emotion is even greater because it’s as if all his joyful characters left as well. Luckily, that is not the case, they are on film to be seen for a long time. But the spark that created those characters is gone, and that is almost just as sad.
The Depth
While we love comedy and laughter, and it helps us balance out the pain in the world or in our own lives, it’s important to realize that laughter will never truly mask pain permanently. Pain will find a way out, either directly or indirectly. The more you attempt to go around pain, the farther and scarier your journey to healing actually becomes. It’s tough to face it directly and honestly we all find ways to avoid it if we can, but eventually we have to face it and the sooner we do, the stronger we will be.
From Ebony of Perth
I found the quote I used while reading a blogging friend’s heartfelt response to his death. It touched me because of how it connected William’s death to her own personal story of her father’s death. Here is what she wrote.
For Robin’s family, there may never be a silver lining evident. As someone who has lost my dad to suicide, I want people to know that even in dark times, there is light to be found.
I found out that my dad died the day after MJ passed and virtually suffered in silence as the world mourned a controversial celebrity. He had sent me a message I never replied to and have not been capable of reading since. Despite that, it does get better. We can all heal together.
Today there may be no blessings for Robin’s family. The majority of the world are far enough away from the loss, to be able to see that this can be a lesson on mental health and the fucked up stigma surrounding it.
The shiniest angels sometimes have the darkest demons. What goes up must come down. Ask for help and offer it whenever you feel is right. The answer to an unasked question is always no and ignorance is not bliss any more. Unless you felt good when you heard.
We have lost a warrior, we have not lost the war. May his memory rest in peace and his works remain in history forever.
You can find out more about Ebony of Perth at her website, The Adventures of Ebony.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
Quote and quoted story by Ebony Arwen, 1992 – not dead yet, Australian writer and blogger
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