I love/hate that today is #2 of my ‘Shop ‘Til You Drop’ series.
Ok, fine. This is not just about women.
I recently lost about 25 lbs. As a result some of my clothes don’t fit. Most of my pants I have noticed it all along, except my jeans and some of heavier material, which I do not usually wear during the summer. I started wearing them this fall and in some of them I look like a baggy bag man. I also didn’t wear many long sleeves shirts over the summer and early fall. But now I have had a number of times I tried on my long sleeve shirts only to find they are similar in look to Seinfeld’s Puffy Pirate Shirt. Not the look I am going for. Combine one of those shirts with one of my baggy pants and I am baggy bag man extraordinaire.
I did find a great shirt in the back of my closet this past weekend, perfect to wear out to a gallery opening and dinner with Linda. I put it on remembering it used to be too tight. I knew it would fit perfectly now and it did. Only one problem. There is a button missing right at the belly button. I remember losing it but didn’t really care because the shirt didn’t fit and I knew I would probably never wear it again. Oops.
So I finally found a shirt that wasn’t a puffy pirate shirt and went searching for a pair of pants. I found what seemed like the only pants I had that fit that weren’t thin summer pants, too dressy or jeans. Hadn’t worn them in a while but maybe I hadn’t worn them in so long they were from when I was thinner, way back when. Or maybe they came from that consignment shopping trip I did in the spring, I had no idea. I tried them on and I wasn’t immediately baggy bag man.
However, they were ridiculously wrinkled and had dust on the fold over the hanger and that meant I had to iron them and use one of those sticky roller things on them. But Linda was taking a nap and I didn’t want to wake her. You know what an ironing board sounds like when you pop it open? They are never silent, they are always squeeky and squeely. I tried, but it made the noise it was destined to make from the beginning of time, and woke Linda up. I think she thought it was a dog making a weird sound, not me. So I let her believe it. I ironed my pants and I looked slightly non-baggy bag man for the day.
I need to go shopping.
Drawing and story by Marty Coleman
Quote by Mignon McLaughlin, 1913-1983, American Journalist and Author