Jan
19
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The intelligent people are the quiet ones. The strong, silent type is the epitome of the desired male. One should listen twice as much as they talk. All very nice sentiments, but the truth is in a relationship talking (and listening) is crucial. If you don’t speak, if you don’t say what is going on, it becomes the rule. And you could very easily have a sorry end to the relationship as a result.
Sometimes one doesn’t talk because they feel the reaction will be negative, defensive, or angry. Those are actually understandable reasons to not want to communicate feelings, emotions and ideas. No one likes to be dismissed, lectured or put down when they share vulnerable things.
It often takes courage to talk in a relationship, but the alternative is a deep seated frustration. It is ultimately unhealthy for oneself and the relationship. Talk, even if it is scary.
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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784, English writer
Nov
23
I am grateful today is day#2 of Gratitude Week at The NDD.
What makes a person gross? Do you see a connection between your understanding of that term and lack of gratitude? What does ‘great cultivation’ mean? Explain.
Drawing by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784, English author (and more!)
Apr
19
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Have you ever told a story about something big that has happened to you and a person listening will shyly say something like that happened to them too, but on a much smaller scale? They speak with the feeling their event wasn’t really worthy compared to yours. It was inconsequential, unimportant. It might have been an accident, or a home improvement project, or meeting a minor celebrity versus meeting a major one.
When that happens to me I always try to listen and reassure the person that what they went through, their ‘event’, was important, even if it was small in the grand scheme of things. Because after all, what event isn’t small in the grand scheme of things, no matter how large you think it is?
This is especially true when talking to teenagers and young people. Their events might not be as dramatic and big as yours, but they are that big to them! Treat their events as important and big, don’t denigrate them just because they aren’t on the scale you have experienced.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784, English author
Jan
10
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But this is the wrong way to do it. If you are a wife or a boss, a girlfriend or a co-worker, reminding someone is an act of kindness, not one of anger.
I know with me I am not intentionally forgetting something when I can’t remember. I am not testing someone, I am not out to annoy someone. I am simply not remembering.
What I need, and I suspect most men need, is to be reminded in a simple, non-judgmental and neutral way, what it is I might be forgetting. That might be an appointment, or a thank you card I am suppose to write, or a home improvement project I let slide.
Nobody needs to be harangued and nagged about stuff. They need a partner or partners to help them acheive what the need and want to acheive (or to just find the car keys).
Is this only true about men? No, of course not. It really doesn’t matter the gender, the attitude of care and help is what matters.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Samuel Johnson, 1709-1784, English author
