Jun
02
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Tis a week of Ancient Philosophers it is. Let’s start with Diogenes, shall we?
Diogenes was a slave early in his life. The story goes that when he was on the auction block he pointed to his future owner in the crowd and said “Sell me to that man. He needs a master.” He did get sold to that man and went on to become a well known bad boy philosopher in Athens.
The reason I chose this quote though is not about real slaves and owners, it’s about how to master those traits that enslave you. You can hope to get rid of a trait or a habit, and that is best in many cases such as cigarettes and alcohol. But if we are honest with ourselves we are not going to get rid of all our traits and habits, even the bad ones. We are going to live with them. The key is figuring out how to master them and bend them away from negativity and destruction.
Let’s talk eating for example. You can’t not eat. You can’t take it out of your life. You have no option but to let it control you, or you control it. If you were a slave (to the master named food) and you wanted to actually become the master of that master how would you go about it? Would you do as Diogenes did and announce to the world that you were going to be the master? Or would you be more subtle and slowly, but with strong intent, design the life of that master in such a way that you controlled everything he did, everywhere he went, everyone he saw.
Think of it that way and perhaps it will give you a new perspective. And here is the best part. Your master, be it food or something else, is actually pretty dumb. It will allow you to take control of it if you have the will to do so. It’s not up to food, it’s up to you.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Diogenes, 404 BCE – 323 BCE, Greek philosopher. Famous for the story where he went looking for one honest man in Athens and couldn’t find one, even with a lamp in broad daylight. Thanks to one of my favorite quote book authors for this info. James Geary, author of ‘Geary’s Guide to the World’s Great Aphorists’.
May
06
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Day 2 of The Napkin Dad’s Guide to Good Manners
I am not one to talk about the ‘old days’ as if they were better. I am not one to talk about how we did more with less or how good it used to be for kids and how hard it is now for them. For the most part I think that is just old people wishing for better days.
The truth is it’s always been hard for kids. There is always something unique about the culture and society they live in that bring out certain problems they face that earlier generations didn’t have to in the same way.
Today one of the things kids face in the US and many other countries is a very diverse culture. I think that is a good thing. But one of the negatives attached to it is having muddy guidelines about what is proper or improper behavior. It isn’t a uniform definition anymore. Even that isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s just that it makes the job of the parent harder. Not only does the child not see the example being set consistently among other adults when he or she is away from their immediate family, but the parent’s themselves might have been brought up very differently from one another and have different ideas about what is okay or not okay in personal behavior.
That doesn’t mean a parent gives up on teaching. It means they add a new element of discussion and illustration. When you as a parent see what you deem bad manners you explain to your child why you consider it bad. You explain why it is hurtful or inconsiderate. You give them reasons that help them understand that while others may not do it they way the do, they know it is a good and decent way to behave. And whatever you do, do not off load the responsibility to a school, a village, a society or worst of all, the child. It is NOT the responsibility of the child to learn it on his or her own. It is your responsibility as the parent.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Fred Astaire, 1899-1987, American entertainer
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Jan
15
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I know this will get some cosmologists (and maybe cosmetologists if they happen to like stars a lot) upset. I don’t mean to diss the discovery of new things in outer space. I love hearing about them and I love the art of discovery in that realm.
But stars and galaxies don’t touch the senses the way a dish does. The smell, heat, taste, look, even the sound (in the cooking especially), all those things are at the heart of making one smile in that blissful sort of way that illustrates happiness so well.
My wife and daughter love to go out to dinner. When we do we often will order a very common appetizer that we see in restaurant after restaurant, spinach and artichoke dip. We do it because we love discovering the new recipe, to see and taste how it compares to our memories of past dips. It’s a shared sensual treat, a treat of the senses that makes us happy.
What dishes make you smile that smile?
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, 1755-1826, French lawyer, politician and gastronome. He was the father, along with Grimod, of the gastronomic essay.
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NEW! Trivia question of the day:
Which constellation has the North Star in it?
- Ursa Minor
- Orion
- Reticulum
- Corona Borealis
- Oprah
Dec
18
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Nothing explains the current dilemma in America better than this quote. It is about weight, food, obesity and the diseases that go along with them, but it isn’t just about that.
In my mind excess and plenty isn’t a bad thing. The bad thing is what your mind tends to do when you have excess and plenty. What my mind tends to do is worry about keeping it all. About sustaining that world of excess. About making sure we have plenty.
But what I want my mind to do is think about those I come in contact due to that excess and plenty.
I want to worry less about the food I eat and more about being kind to the waiter who brought it.
I want to worry less about the stuff I am giving away to the local charity and worry more about being respectful and caring to the person who helps take it out of my car.
I want to worry less about thinking how some object of beauty I possess will impress others and more about how that same object can be a delight to others.
I want to worry less about the value of my possessions and more about who helped me possess them in the first place.
I want to worry less about enjoying my vacations and more about creating a vacation others will enjoy as well.
When I am in that place I am happy. It’s then that my mind, in spite of or because of any excess and plenty I have, will be focused in the right direction.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily
Quote by John Kenneth Galbraith, 1908-2006, American economist and author
Nov
26
When we are non-grateful we look at what is missing, what we want or feel we should have.
In art instruction there is a technique to help people see the object they are drawing by having them focus on the negative space. the space between and around objects and its shape. Seeing that helps to see the object.
However, in life seeing what isn’t there is a double edged sword. Should you work to attain what you want, work for that you do not have? Sure, it’s a good thing. But to look at what a person doesn’t give instead of what they do isn’t always the same thing. To look at what a society doesn’t give isn’t always the same thing.
Instead of focusing on what is missing, the negative space in your partner, your boss, your child, your society, your culture, focus on the positive space. The things they actually do and be grateful. It doesn’t mean you don’t try to attain something greater. It doesn’t mean you can’t say when your needs aren’t being met. It simply means you acknowledge what is really there.
I am grateful for those of you who read my blog and enjoy the drawings and ideas. I appreciate when you write and tell me stories about your own journey into becoming who you want to be. Thank you.
Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman
