Category Archives: self

A Big Nose

big noses

I Know Noses

In the past few months I have photographed a number of women who have all told me the same thing; they hate their nose because it is too big.  This isn’t new, I have been hearing it from women (never men) most of my art and photography career, which goes back over 35 years.  In not one of those situations did I look at their nose and think that.  Instead I thought their nose was just right for their face in balance, shape and size.  In other words, I loved their nose and thought it added to, not detracted from, their beauty.  

The French Knows Noses

If there is any place on earth that has refined taste, it’s France. This quote is a French proverb. It’s from the country of high sophistication and beautiful art, architecture, women, men, fashion, food and more.   If France can make a national statement about the beauty of the nose, then who are we to disagree, right?

That’s it. That is all I wanted to say. All you women out there who think your nose is too big, I think your nose is beautiful.

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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who knows.

Quote is a French Proverb

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If you ever do get put down for your nose, memorize this monologue from Roxanne.

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Trivia question of the day

What animal has the most olfactory (smell) receptors?

Come back tomorrow for the answer.

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Temptation and Decision Fatigue

I read a great article online about Decision Making in the New York Times Magazine this morning. It led me to today’s drawing and topic. I will link to the magazine at the bottom of the page.

temptation

It’s All Your Fault

If you only had more willpower. If you only learned to discipline yourself.  If you only weren’t so spoiled, gluttonous, slothful, lazy, indulgent, selfish, stupid, immature and short-sighted. If only you had more glucose.  WHAT? Glucose?

Well ok, it’s Your Brain’s Fault

Once again, science is making progress in understanding who we are, how we work and what we can do to improve.  There has been a number of studies in recent years that go under the heading of Decision Fatigue and Ego Depletion. What do those terms mean?  Decision fatigue is the phenomenon whereby each decision you make in a day diminishes your willpower and ability to make subsequent decisions.  Your brain acts like a muscle in the sense that it gets tired after so much exercise that it really can’t work that well anymore.  Ego Depletion is when your ability to retain your decision making skills at your ego’s normal level is diminished.  That is why we tend to make bad decisions (or can’t make one at all) in the afternoon or evening, after a long day of decision making.  But why is this? Well, research seems to be indicating that the reason is a depletion of glucose in the brain. Sugar basically.  it doesn’t stop the brain from working, it just stunts the decision making areas of the brain.  

Parole in the Afternoon

In a study of Israeli parole boards they found that being brought up for parole in the early morning, right after breakfast, the convict had a much better chance of recieving parole than a criminal with the same sentence for the same crime had if he came before the parole board late in the morning, before lunch, or late in the afternoon. In all these cases the difference was the board members inability to decide, not the individual merits of the cases. Why was that? Because they had already made so many decisions that the best, easiest decision was to make none at all.  Leave the decision for another day was the best choice in their decision fatigued mind. And what made their mind fatigued in this way? Lack of glucose.

The Dieting Catch 22

So, how does this apply to dieting? Dieting is all about will power, right? It’s all about deciding again and again and again, not to eat certain foods. What does that insistent decision making do? It depletes one’s ego, the person’s ability to make decisions in their best interest. So, what is needed to restore that ability to make the right choice in dieting? Eating is what is needed. What to eat? Sugar.  How is that for a catch 22?

1. In order not to eat, a dieter needs willpower.

2. In order to have willpower, a dieter needs to eat. *

Moral failure vs Brain Science

One of the best things about our paying attention to scientific discoveries is that it lessens judgment but increases our ability to change and grow.  It is the search for the truth that can help us, and the old, simplistic moral condemnation is ineffective (and alway have been) because it doesn’t help us understand and act on what the real truth is. And the real truth is that we must pay attention to our biology, our chemistry, our cultural and social behaviors and analyse them not with ignorant condemnation but with neutral and effective judgment.  

Judge Yes

Judgment of self is not condemnation of self. It is realizing that you are doing this one thing and, without condemning yourself, that can decide that you will change doing that one thing into doing another thing. The truth is you won’t be more effective (and more likely will be less effective) by dumping a truckload of guilt on yourself in the process.  It’s not an excuse and it’s not a license to do something bad. It is just a more effective and positive way to pursue the change you want to see in your life.

 

Do You Suffer From Decision Fatigue? – New York Times Magazine 8/17/11

Let me know what you think of this.

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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman

Quote by Mae West

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Laboring with Your Self

It’s a different kind of labor day in my mind today.

 

labor with self

Illusions of Your Self

Have you ever had a moment when you realized you weren’t who you thought you were? Maybe you thought you were a paragon of moral virtue then found yourself having an affair.  Maybe you thought you were heroic and brave only to find out when something dangerous happened you became a coward.  Maybe you thought you were dowdy and prudish but later realized you were sexy and alluring.  

How did these revelations come about?  Sometimes they were forced upon you by circumstances.  Other times it was someone who said something that allowed that new way of seeing yourself to come about.  Maybe it was a book or a movie or the death of someone you loved.  Whatever it was, it led you to believe you had a new identity.  It was good perhaps, or maybe it was depressing to find this new you inhabiting your body.

The Real You, Distorted

But at least now you know the real you, right?  Maybe our goal shouldn’t be to know the ‘real’ self. Maybe it should be to realize we have always been our real self, only slightly distorted, like in a fun house mirror. Maybe our goal should be to collect all those mirrors and look at all the multiple distortions honestly and clearly. Perhaps then we will see ourselves most accurately.

How do we do this?  I like the idea of making a list of all my identities.  Going all the way back to when you were young, who have you seen yourself as? I bet we would discover a lot, don’t you think?

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Drawing and quote by Marty Coleman

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Who is ‘You’? – Independence Week #2

Yesterday it was about men, today – women. It’s Independence Week at the NDD.

How Do You Declare Your Independence?

Why, Women?

This could be about men, it’s true. Many men don’t ever hear that voice inside themselves. But it does seem, at least in my American experience, to be especially true of women.  But I would like to hear from my female friends, is this true for you? Have you heard that voice? Are you hoping to? How did you know it was from within and not just another voice from without? What did you do about it?

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Drawing by Marty Coleman, who hasn’t read the book, but did see the movie.

Quote by Betty Friedan, American author & feminist

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Who is Your Strongest Competition?

You Are. 

Competition with Self

The Fight Within

It’s not ‘the competition’ who is your strongest competition, it’s you.  It’s your decision to settle. It’s your decision to give up. It’s your decision to blame circumstances or others or the weather.  Win the battle with your mediocre, excusing self and you’ll win, simple as that.

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Drawing by Marty Coleman, who is preaching to himself.

 

 

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