My First Kiss

I might be a man but I remember very well my first kiss.

I had gone to my very first dance. I was 12 years old and was going to be entering 7th grade.  I went to a thing called ‘Sports Night’ at the Jr. High I was going to attend in Los Angeles. I suppose somebody somewhere was in a gym playing sports, but I was in the room with the band, the girls and the dancing.  And then I saw the girl.  My first over the top, heart beating fast, crazy puppy love girl. Her name was Lisa Millward and I was smitten the moment I saw her.  I don’t remember how we met but I found out she was 1/2 grade ahead of me so she knew the ropes of the dances having gone before. She was my first ‘older woman’ as well as my first love.  

We danced the night away and I fell in love with her in the course of those few short hours.  It wouldn’t be the last time I fell in love with someone on the dance floor, but it was my first.  Far too quickly it was time to go.  We both went outside to wait for our parents to come pick us up. We talked for just a bit, then the moment came.  She leaned in, I figured out what she was doing so I leaned in and we kissed.  It was pretty unexpected on my part so I didn’t have enough time to really get nervous about it.  It was just a smidgen longer than a peck but it was on the lips and that made it count.  My heart was beating crazy fast, I remember that much.

Here is the kicker.   My father and sister had just driven up in the car to pick me up and witnessed the whole thing.  Of course, my sister made merciless fun of me, saying I was leaning in at some ridiculously awkward angle and looked completely dorky.  I think my dad enjoyed the moment of his son taking that leap.

My Second Kiss

Back in those days you used the phone book to look everyone up. The listings usually just had the mom and dad’s names so I probably called every Millward in the book until I found her.  We made arrangements to go bowling with a group of friends. It was a lot of fun but I was distracted the whole time because I wanted to have a real kiss with her, not in public view this time.  I kept trying to think about how I could make that happen.

After bowling the two of us took a walk down to this 3 story office building at the end of the strip mall.  There was an elevator that was all by itself, outside the building, connected by outdoor walkways to each floor. I decided it would be the perfect place to have a real kiss.  We got in the elevator and went up. Then we went down. Then up again. Then down again.  The whole time I was a nervous wreck, completely frozen in my inability to make the move.  Finally, after probably about 5 trips up and down I did what any crazy in love 12 year old would do, I pulled the stop button on the elevator between floors and kissed her.  It was glorious and wonderful and the highlight of my life up until that moment (and for quite a while after that).

The Aftermath

The first part of the summer was the best ever. I went to the beach or went swimming or did something else with her almost every day. We kissed a lot.  But alas the fates were cruel.  My father took a job 3,000 miles away in New York and before the summer was out we were gone to live in Connecticut.  I pined away for her all the rest of the summer and well into the next school year.  We sent love letters and I even got a Valentines letter with a big heart on the front that she had drawn with lipstick.

The letters started to dwindle off over the course of the spring, from my side as well as hers, but I still was madly in love with her. We drove across the country to visit California that next summer and I was crazy with anticipation about seeing her again.  It didn’t turn out all that great.  I found out my friends back in Calif had sent the Valentine’s letter as a joke to me (how I missed that it wasn’t from her I have no idea) and she really just wasn’t all that interested in me anymore.  I was hurt but not terribly so. I had already started to realize this wasn’t going to be a lasting thing while back in Connecticut, having found other girls who peaked my interest in kissing.

What that relationship really taught me was how easy it was for me to fall in love with the idea of being in love!  I have moderated that some over the years, but I don’t really ever want to leave it completely behind. After all, being in love is a feeling worth being in love with.

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Drawing and revealing biographical sketch by Marty Coleman, who has yet to find Lisa on Facebook.

Quote by Remy de Gourmont, 1858-1915, French Symbolist poet

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Trivia Question of the Day

If you were going to give a ‘nachkussen’, what sort kiss would you be giving? 

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