I must admit, it’s day #5 of Happy Born Day week!

First, a Question

I want your opinion on this.  What do you think of these two elements, a woman sometimes not wanting to admit her age and a man often not acting his? Is it as gender based as the quote states?  Are you the opposite, a woman who doesn’t act her age or a man who lies about his?  How did that come about?  Think about it, read my take on it, and let me know what your take on it is, ok?

My Age Confession

I find myself sometimes not wanting to admit my age, which is 58 as of 2013.  Then other times I take great pride in it.  Sometimes it’s due to the audience. If I am talking to the runners I coach I readily admit my age because I want them to see that age is not an excuse to not be fit.  But if I am talking to professionals in my arena of business I sometimes think twice because I worry that they might see me as too old to participate in a discussion about parenting for example, or a panel about social media, since, given my age, I might be out of the loop on those things.  

But the truth is I have set it up so I couldn’t hide my age if I wanted. My birthday is out in the world, when the moment arrives for me to divulge my age I do so with minimal hesitation, even if I do have a bit of worry.  It takes one more thing out of my ‘worry equations’ early on and I can get on with the business at hand.  What happens happens. 

The First Lie

I wrote that confession above so you would know I am not thinking it is only women who don’t like to admit their age at times.  But it is true that overall I find women are much more likely to hesitate about saying their age.  Why is that and does it really matter?  I think it matters a bit. I would like to think I have an honest enough relationship with whatever woman I am talking to that if the matter of her, or my, age comes up we would just say it and move on.  But, while I would prefer to know the truth, it isn’t, in most cases, a crucial element in the relationship.  

The Second Lie

But what about men?  A woman might say she is 45 and actually be 50. But a man who IS 45 but acts 20 is inflicting a far more grievous offense on whoever he is relating to.  Why is that? Because he looks 45 and can pretend to be emotionally or developmentally 45, but in truth he is acting.  His true age, his true development,  was stunted at age 20 and over time he is going to act 20 quite often.  

Buyer Beware

What does that mean? It means ‘buyer beware’. This sounds terrible crude and cruel to put the onus on the woman to find out a man’s true emotional and developmental age, but it is the truth.  A woman has to be in a relationship long enough and with a clear enough mind to be able to discern who is this guy, really?  Not what does he look like, or what job he holds, but what age does he act?  If a woman wants a baby who she needs to clean up after, who is constantly making a mess of his own life and the lives of those he should be watching over, then she should choose one of those developmentally stunted men. But how many women REALLY want that man? Not many.  

The Triple Play Trap

So why do so many women end up with those men? I think it’s because they are either thinking all men are like that, they think it’s part of the devil’s bargain they have to make to be ‘taken care of’ or they think the man will change once they are married.  None of those reasons are very good ones if you ask me.

The Questions Revisited

Once again, here are my questions to you: What do you think of these two elements, a woman sometimes not wanting to admit her age and a man often not acting his? Is it as gender based as the quote states?  Are you the opposite, a woman who doesn’t act her age or a man who lies about his?  How did that come about?

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Drawing and commentary by Marty Coleman, who once lied about his height by one inch and got busted on a first date.

Quote by Anonymous

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