SXSW

If you feel I give good things to you via The Napkin, would you do me the favor of commenting on and voting for my workshop proposal for SXSW 2016?  http://panelpicker.sxsw.com/vote/55965  You do have to register into the SXSW site but that is so they won’t be overwhelmed by spammers. It is not an obligation to do, attend or buy anything. Thank you very much, Marty

Communications

My increasing use of Periscope has made me think a lot about communication lately so I am starting a new series on it this week.

Who We Are

Have you ever listened to someone who is so grating, so annoying that you just can’t stand to listen to them?  It really doesn’t matter what they say, you pay no attention because all you can think of is wanting them to shut up. You can’t hear what they are saying.

Or perhaps you are up late at night watching a televangelist or a informercial and you hate it but still watch it. It’s like watching a car wreck. You want to turn away because it’s ugly and gruesome but you want to watch to see how bad it may get. But while doing that you aren’t actually listening to the message or the product qualities, you are only watching for the perverse entertainment value. You can’t hear what they are saying.

Preconceived Notions

Sometimes the person hasn’t said a word yet and you already have decided not to listen to him or her.  It could be because you are prejudice against them due to their race or gender. Maybe it’s because they are in a certain political party or on a certain TV or Radio station.  But whatever the case you aren’t open to hearing what they have to say.

Open Mind

I’ve listened to enough Fox News to know they are not my cup of tea.  When I heard they were going to put on the first Republican debate of the 2016 election cycle I did not have high expectations. When it became obvious Donald Trump was going to be front and center in that debate I didn’t have high expectations either. But what I did have was an open mind. I was willing to watch the debate and hear all of them, in spite of some reservations about both the news channel and the candidates. 

I would still not consider myself a fan of Fox News. But I am a fan of how the three people did their jobs as journalists asking questions. I thought they were tough and to the point. They exceeded my expectations, especially Megyn Kelly.

I was not a fan of Donald Trump before the debate and I am still not a fan. He lived up to my preexisting opinion of him, which is; take away the money and fame and you are looking at an insensitive, simplistic, bullying brute. Put him in overalls and give him a wad of tobacco instead of being in a bespoke suit and tie and he would be considered the worst cartoon stereotype of a backward, uneducated and mean-spirited hick you could find.

In both cases though I was open to having my opinion changed. I was not so set against something or someone that I was unwilling to consider what it is they actually said.  I heard what they said and I made my judgment.

Their Fault, My Fault

I do my best to hear what a person has to say but I am not always able to do that. Sometimes there is just too much of ‘who they are’ in the way.  But my effort, in spite of not always succeeding, is to take that out of the equation as best I can.

Of course, I want people to hear me clearly as well. I hate the idea that someone will not hear me because I have a bad reputation or because they have some negative memory of me.  That is my fault and I have to live with it. If that is something I can control going forward then I want to control it.

But if someone can’t hear me because I am a man, or an older man, or white, or middle class, or American, or not their version of Christian or something else that has to do with their prejudice more than who I am, then I have to let that go. I can be sensitive to not live up to certain stereotypes of course, but I am going to have the best outcome by being the best me I can be, not by fighting every possible prejudice there might be against me.

Your thoughts?

Drawing and commentary © 2015 Marty Coleman | napkindad.com

Quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, 1803-1882, American author