I drew this drawing and wrote the commentary 4 years ago today. It references a drawing and short story I published the day before. I republished it a few days ago.
Self-Esteem
I wrote a short story yesterday about a homeless woman and her daughter. The mother was confronted by a woman who judged her negatively without really knowing her. The daughter was upset about the judgment and her mother used the opportunity to explain that the judgment wasn’t based on the lady knowing them. She explained that she judged because she had some hurt in her that she was trying to get out and judging others was her way of doing that. The child was lucky to have a mother to help explain that their self-esteem came from them, not from some random person who did not know them.
Other’s Story About You
I am guessing those of you reading this have been called one of the words in the drawing above. Some are negative and some are positive, but all of them are fables, or stories. That doesn’t mean they may not have some truth in them. Maybe they do, maybe they don’t. But at the most they are incomplete statements of who you are and at the least they are outright lies. Wherever they are in the arch of truth, the reason they are spoken has more to do with the person speaking than it has to do with you.
It doesn’t make their story your story.
Your Story About Yourself
When I have a model for one of my art projects I will often ask the following question: ‘What is your favorite facial feature on yourself?’ Many will answer in the following way: “Well, most people say it’s my ‘type in facial feature here’. I, in response, will say, “I am not asking what others think is your best feature, I am asking YOU what you think is.” That gets them thinking and they often, but not always, will change their answer. They might say, “No one ever says this, but I love my nose best because it reminds me of my dad.” or something like that. That to me illustrates the difference between the story you would tell about yourself and the story others may tell about you.
Trust It
Look hard for your own story in the midst of all that outside noise and believe it. Don’t let others’ story about you decide who you are.
Story Link
The Judgment
Drawing, quote and commentary © 2019 Marty Coleman | napkindad.com