The Slut and Her Response – The Illustrated Insult #5

 

Don’t be insulted but it’s the last day of The Illustrated Insult.

 

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 The ‘Slut’

There once was a woman, Natalie, who found out, second hand through her friend Sandy, that another friend, Lisa, had called her a slut.  This was said because Natalie had gone out on a date with Ben, who bragged to a mutual friend, Sam, about his conquest.  Sam in turn told Lisa.  Lisa was upset about this and and ranted to Sandy.  Sandy then mentioned it to Natalie at a party the next night.

Response #1

Natalie was hurt by this.  The reason she was hurt was she knew that Ben had lied. He had not ‘conquered’ her (meaning had sex with her).  She also knew he had told Sam he had done so as to make Natalie look bad. She didn’t know why, but he obviously hated her for some reason.  Sam had to hate her too and also wanted to wreck her reputation.  As a matter of fact all four of her ‘friends’ weren’t her friends at all, they hated her.  

Natalie left the party, cried long into the night and isolated herself for the rest of the weekend.  She stayed distant from them all and others in her circle of friends. When she did return to the fold she wasn’t the same.  She remained angry and eventually she drifted away from the group and spent the rest of her year pretty much on her own.  She found it hard to make friends for a long time, always suspicious that her trust was misplaced.

Response #2

Natalie was hurt by this. The reason she was hurt was she knew that Ben had lied. He had not ‘conquered’ her (meaning had sex with her). But she also knew he had told Sam he had done so as to make himself look good. She didn’t know why, but he obviously felt inferior to Sam and wanted to prove himself somehow.  It wasn’t good that he had lied, but she felt bad that he would go to such lengths. He had some issues he needed to deal with that had nothing to do with her.  She know that Sam always felt on the edge of the group of friends.  Him finding out about this supposed conquest would give him an in with a girl he had a crush on, Lisa, so it made sense he would tell her.  This also wasn’t good, but it certainly didn’t say anything about how he felt about her.  She knew Lisa had just had a pregnancy scare earlier in the year and had preached to her about making sure she didn’t make the same mistake she had made. Now Lisa had heard Natalie HAD made the same mistake and so had likely just gone off on a rant, calling her a slut the same way she had been called a slut by some just a few months earlier. Natalie also knew Lisa had a short temper and that her parents were extremely judgmental of almost everyone.  Natalie also knew Sandy was everyone’s confidant and she would listen to anything.  The fact that Sandy had told her what Lisa said was more about Sandy thinking she was being a friend that it was her trying to hurt anyone.

Natalie stayed at the party.  When Ben showed up she brought him aside and told him what she had heard. She looked him straight in the eye and told him that not only was their friendship over but she would expect to hear from Sam, Lisa and Sandy that he had gone to them all and said he had lied.  She doubted he would really do that but she wanted him to know she was in control, not him.  She eventually talked to Sam and Lisa, explaining what actually happened. She left it at that.  It made her a bit wary of her friends for a while but she not only kept their friendship over time but rose high in their eyes as a woman of character and someone they admired and trusted.

Rejecting Injury

How did Natalie reject this injury?  She did it by assuming the best motives and understanding the weaknesses of her friends.  She approached them, in spite of the hurt, with love and kindness instead of hatred and anger.

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Drawing and Story by Marty Coleman

Quote by Marcus Aurelius, 121AD – 180AD, Roman Emperor, Stoic Philosopher

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Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears

>If You Are Distressed

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Don’t forget to VOTE for The Napkin Dad in the ‘aha moment’ project. Deadline is Oct. 31st so don’t delay.
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It’s stressful coming to the end of ‘Stress Week’ at The Napkin Dad Daily!

I remember arguing with my wife about something she was worried about, afraid might happen.  I was trying to argue rationally, giving her all the reasons not to worry. She finally had to stop me and say, ‘MARTY, it’s not a rational FEAR, you can’t argue it away with rational arguments!’


So, if your fear, stress, worry, anger, etc. is irrational, you must be irrational in your response to it, right? Oh, heck if I know. But…


It’s only a spider.
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Drawing and irrational commentary by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily


Quote by my favorite Roman Emperor.  Can you guess who that is?

>All is Ephemeral

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Day #2 of ‘Fame Week” at The Napkin Dad Daily.  Today we move into the Roman Empire with a quote by my favorite Emperor, Marcus Aurelius.
So, we started with Socrates talking about the perfume of heroic deeds being what fame is made of.  Now, 500-600 years later we read the Emperor Aurelius saying it will all fade away, fame and the famous.  What happened to make that transformation?

Well, most likely it was Marcus Aurelius’ own observations of the history of his time.  The golden age of Greece was ancient history to him by then, they were unearthing old remnants of that era and reconstructing some element of it but overall they saw it as long gone.  Even the rich and famous and powerful of his day were supplanted and forgotten.  The death of Caesar was already almost 200 years in the past.  That is roughly akin in our era to remembering back to the death of George Washington in 1799.

Yes, George is still famous.  Yes, Caesar is still famous.  But the Emperor is not really talking about those exceptions to the rule. He is talking about the hundreds and thousands and millions of others who thought themselves so important, so indispensable who are now forgotten by all.

It’s a sad thought in some ways, but it is a good thought in many more ways. It keeps us focused on the reality of now.  We may be remembered for a while, maybe hundreds or even thousands of years in some cases. but it’s not likely and it’s not something to depend on.

What we can depend on is now.  You are here now.  What deed can you do now? What obscure and unseen gesture can you do now to help a friend, encourage a co-worker? Will it lead to fame? Not likely. But will it lead to love and kindness growing? Yes, it will.  And that is worth more than all the fame you could ever gather for yourself.

Drawing by Marty Coleman of The Napkin Dad Daily

Quote by Marcus Aurelius, 121-180 CE, Stoic philosopher, Emperor of the Roman Empire

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Don’t forget to VOTE in the ‘aha moment’ campaign!  Once per computer unti
l Oct. 15th, then, if I reach the finals, the voting starts again.