Annie finished reading her daily scripture and was contemplating its meaning when the phone rang. She decided, based on her morning study, that she was not going to answer the phone. The phone call was from the National Academy of Poodle Excellence and they were going to offer her a job as Executive Vice President. This wasn’t the first time she hadn’t answered a call from this number so they eventually gave up on her. They offered the job to Sid, a poodle in Oklahoma, who took it and eventually reached world-wide fame as the CEO of NAPE. Annie meanwhile continued her studies and was never the wiser because she didn’t watch the news.
A Woman Making Her Way – An Illustrated Short Story
Deborah was at a spring party in someone’s backyard. She told the man who was too interested in her this analogy. She saw herself as being on a paddleboard, making her way through the perils of life. She had to row, she had to balance, she had to keep strong, and she had to focus to avoid all the dangers around her and get to where she wanted to go.
The man who was too interested lost interest and went on to another young woman at the party. Deborah smiled and went over to the canape table and ate 6 crackers with crab dip on them.
She was writing the letter to her father but had a hard time saying what she wanted so she had started it 7 times.
By that time she was copying bits and pieces of the earlier attempts into the letter in the hope it would finally come together.
The first letter was too harsh. The second was too mushy. The third was too mushy. The fourth was too safe. The fifth was too pretentious and the sixth was too boring.
The seventh was turning out to be all those things and she didn’t like that so she took a break to get another cup of coffee.
As she stood in line she saw a mother roughly pull her child out of the way of a customer walking with a hot cup of tea. It reminded her of something good.
She put on her headphones and got lost in her romance novel until it was her turn to order. The barista said, “Bless you.” when she paid. It gave her a warm feeling.
While she was waiting at the end of the counter she saw an old man grab a pile of napkins as he picked up his drink with both hands. He smiled at her and said, “You can never be too careful, right?”. “Don’t I know it.” she said back with a smile.
As she settled back in her chair she heard the man behind her explain in great, minute detail the process of brewing a perfect cup of coffee to whoever he was with. She quietly chuckled and rolled her eyes.
She felt confident now of what she wanted to tell her father. She smiled as she wrote the five words and signed her given name.
She wanted to go to the Forum where she could show off her new hairdo and earrings and watch wrestling and talk and eat and flirt and listen to people say profound things and maybe get a mani/pedi. She would see her friends and have fun, laughing and enjoying the day.
She didn’t want to walk all the way up the hill and look at disgusting dead people on crucifixes all by herself. It was hot and her feet would get dirty and there would be flies and vermin and the smell would be aweful. Plus, people might see her up there and think she is somehow connected to those dead people and then people would start talking and not want to be around her.
She stood there a long time before she made her choice.
Spiralita was a happy girl, in spite of her questions. As a matter of fact, it was her questions that gave herself that happy identity. She was known throughout the land as the ‘Question Girl’. Some made fun of her because of all the questions she asked and some admired her for always being so curious about the world.
But she paid no attention to those people since she didn’t ask her questions because or for them. She asked them because she wanted to know answers. Not THE answer, just answers. Answers were the answer to everything.
The Answer is the Answer
And because she was always asking questions she was always getting answers. She didn’t always believe the answers because she knew answers could be wrong. But she believed even in getting wrong answers. Wrong answers she understood were the only thing that led to right answers because they were the reason for asking more questions and questions were essential to answers. You can’t have one without the other.
The Hill of Life
What made her happy about all this was she knew that getting answers led to progress up the Hill of Life. Getting up any hill wasn’t easy but getting up the Hill of Life was especially hard because it was very steep and very rocky. It was uneven and sometimes dangerous. It could be beautiful and wonderful but not always. Each sharp, giant boulder and each dark, swampy part was overcome by finding the answer to a question. She knew if she practiced asking questions and finding answers when the path wasn’t too hard she would be better at it when she reached these scary parts.
The Solo Climb
And it worked. She was successful in getting to the top of the Hill of Life and just as importantly, she was happy doing it. She felt bad for some of her friends who stumbled and fell back down the hill along the way, even though she tried to help them. She was happy though for her other friends who also figured out how to get to the top. But she knew, in the end, that each person had to climb the hill by themselves.
In the Book of Revelation there is a terrible dragon. Here is how it is described: “Then another sign appeared in heaven: an enormous red dragon with seven heads and ten horns and seven crown on its heads.” Rev. 12:3
Well, this isn’t that dragon. This is Antenna, that dragon’s younger sister. She’s not talked about in the bible, probably to preserve the older one’s evil reputation. Antenna isn’t terrible and evil. She’s just trying to make her way in the world.
Her name is Antenna because she was conceived on an antenna. The antenna didn’t fare too well in that tryst and had to be replaced but it still held fond memories for her mum and dad.
Each head also had her own name; Liza, Milly, Ruth, Martha, Alice, Sarah and Dorcas, which they got after their parents watched Seven Brides for Seven Brothers on late night TV.
Antenna had one baby dragon with 3 heads. It was a boy named Laundromat because that is the building on top of which he was conceived. That building fared okay after just a few repairs. The 3 heads were named Babe, Lou and Joe because the father was a big Yankees fan.
Antenna had a hard time early in life because of her older brother’s terrible reputation. She always wanted to defend her brother as just being misunderstood, but it was hard when he basically was responsible for all sorts of cosmic death and destruction wherever he went.
She tried to make up for it by being very nice to everyone she met. That also was not easy since the heads all had their own personalities. Some were quite rude, some were quiet introverts and a couple were just big loudmouths. It was really quite annoying at times but she did the best she could.
She eventually moved to the northern coast of California and lived among the Redwoods where she didn’t look nearly as big and scary to those who came to visit. She worked as a rescue specialist helping to find people lost at sea or in the forest. She retired at age 812 and spent the rest of her years giving tours to Japanese tourists who came to see the big trees and dragon.
Her son Laundromat (Launny for short) became a nano-engineer with a number of high-tech start ups and had 49 patents by the time he was 531.
Susan seldom saw herself in this space. But between bouts of binge watching and bra burning she brought herself before the bastion of beauty. With wonder and wisdom she willingly wept at the way in which the wayward artist had winnowed down the wasteful and worthless and wicked and woeful and was left with only the worthy and wonderful and winsome. She decided to dutifully display the divine art in her dining room where her dependents would, no doubt, demand she defend her decision to ditch the dog do drivel that had been displayed before the divorce. Susan sat sassily at the Sunday soiree surrounded by so many sons and smiled and said see I shall show something satisfying to myself and you shall simply sit and suffer. The brothers busted out a big bah ha ha and then, being boys, blabbed about the ballgame.
Once upon a time there were six sextuplet sisters. The were named Wendy, Sally, Debra, Fiona, Angela and Gail. They all looked exactly the same when they were born. But as they grew they started to look different, one from the other. How they looked ended up being how others saw them, even if they weren’t really like that.
WENDY
Wendy had high, arched eyebrows so people thought she was always wondering. But she was not. She was wonderful and winsome and woeful and wicked and wired and wonky. But she was not wondering.
SALLY
Sally always looked like she was trying poop so people thought she was stressed. But she was not. She was scary and soulful and silly and sacred and sturdy and scandalous. But she was not stressed.
DEBRA
Debra had blue hair and green skin and so people thought she was depressed. But she was not. She was doubtful and dangerous and dorky and definitive and debatable and dramatic. But she was not depressed.
FIONA
Fiona had a head shaped like a football so people thought she was a football fan. But she was not. She was fastidious and fearless and fabulous and farty and forgetful and forebearing. But she wasn’t a football fan.
ANGELA
Angela didn’t smile much so people thought she was always angry. But she was not. She was angular and ambitious and absolute and ambulatory and arboreal and agnostic. But she wasn’t angry.
GAIL
Gail liked dark makeup so people thought she was goth. But she was not. She was garrulous and grand and gifted and goofy and gleeful and gorgeous. But she wasn’t goth.
The six sextuplet sisters loved sailing and shuffleboard and star gazing and sharing souffles and sauntering together. But they didn’t like being judged only by their looks. Their parents taught them to pass by people who did that and instead just go forward being who they wanted to be, always believing in each other and being best buddies. They had a fabulous family and faithful friends because of that.
The woman was so anxious to finally tell the other woman about what was going on in her life because the other woman was a good friend. They were able to go have coffee one fall morning and have time to talk. The woman spilled her guts to the other woman, telling her all about her husband’s terrible behavior, including verbal abuse and cheating on her with some other woman. The other woman listened intently to everything she said and nodded in what the woman thought was signs of sympathy. But the woman was wrong about the other woman being sympathetic because she was the other woman.
Medusa Studies for an Exam – The Adventures of Medusa
Medusa needed to read her Greek Mythology book for her Ancient Religion class so she went to a local coffee house to study. She was minding her own business, drinking her cappuccino and eating her gluten-free caramel brownie when a man came up and started to talk to her. She was polite and said hello but then said she needed to study and wasn’t able to talk right then. He didn’t get the hint and kept talking to her as he leaned up against the fireplace. He started to compliment how beautiful she was and what a great body she had. He started asking her questions about her relationship status and if she came there often. She didn’t respond to him, keeping her nose squarely in her book. He got annoyed and called her a cold, snobby bitch. She turned around to look at him. He was stone cold silent from then on.
She finished reading, took the test and passed with flying colors.
The End
You can read more by looking up ‘Adventures of Medusa’ in the ‘series’ drop down menu on the right.
