How To Draw A Napkin
How to Draw a Napkin – Step 10: Find New Wife
Finally Step 10! Step 10a-10d: See 1a-1d Step 10e: Get divorced after 20 years of marriage. Step 10f: Start dating woman from church who is also getting divorced. Step 10g: Stop dating woman from church and introduce her to guy in Sunday School. Step 10h: Have woman...
How to Draw a Napkin – Step 9: Lose Job & Wife
It sounds worse than it was, but it was bad. Steps 9a-9d: Repeat 1a-1d Step 9e: Watch as wife drifts away from relationship. Step 9f: Watch as company where I have dream job goes bankrupt. Step 9g: Become unemployed. __________________ Concept, drawing and...
How to Draw a Napkin – Step 8: Move Far Away
Take a road trip with me across the country! Steps 8a-8d: See 1a-1d Step 8e: Give up looking for a college teaching job after 8 unsuccessful years. Step 8f: Retrain yourself in computer graphics, using your family's and friend's computers during the day while they are...
How To Draw a Napkin – Step 7: Teach Drawing
Yes, I am trying to draw you in. Steps 7a-7d: see 1a-1d Step 7e: Get a part time job teaching drawing at a community college. Step 7f: Get another part time job doing the same thing at a different community college. Step 7g: Get a third job doing the same thing at yet...
How To Draw a Napkin – Step 6: Get a Degree (or 2)
It's a new week and we are graduating to step six! Step 6a-6d: See steps 1a-1d. Step 6e: Move 515 miles to first college out of high school. Miss first semester because of being blown up. Step 6f: Move 919 miles to second college because first college closes down....
How To Draw A Napkin – Step 5: Wait Tables
I know you have been waiting for this, so I am putting it on the table for you! Steps 5a-5d: See steps 1a-1d Step 5e: Get job at a restaurant. Step 5f: Draw and photograph many of your co-workers and patrons (but not the ones you spill things on). Step 5g: Meet art...
How To Draw A Napkin – Step 4: Have Babies
I know you weren't expecting this, but it was due! __________________ Steps 4a-4d: Repeat steps 1a-1d. Step 4e: Meet someone. Step 4f: Marry them (traditional version) Step 4g: Have sex with them (traditional version) Step 4h: Get pregnant, or help at least...
How To Draw A Napkin – Step 3: Have A Show
Come on, let's have a show! Here is what you do next in your journey to draw a napkin. Step 3a-3d: Repeat steps 1a-1d Step 3e: Draw yourself at your big exhibition opening greeting all the admiring guests. Step 3f: Color in the drawing of yourself at the big...
How To Draw a Napkin – Step 2: Become an Artist
I hope this public service series on how to draw a napkin is helping you. Steps 2a-2d: Repeat steps 1a-1d Step 2e: Go to art college or at least a big empty space and draw naked people a lot. Men, women or hermaphrodites are acceptable. Step 2f: Move from drawing...
How To Draw A Napkin – Step 1: Learn To Draw
Many people have asked me to teach them how to draw a napkin. So here is my FREE tutorial. Pay close attention. Step 1a: Get a napkin Step 1b: Get some markers Step 1c: Draw a rectangle in the color of your choosing (note: creative moment of free will)...